It’s business, it’s not sex!

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It’s business, it’s not sex!

I believe this is my second time writing an article with that title. The first time (here), almost 5 years ago, I was a couple of weeks away from starting a new job role in a new organization, after quitting a job I loved a lot. I started having cold-feet and second-guessing that decision, thinking about what I had to lose 10 years down the line. I called up a friend to talk me out of taking on the new job. He listened to me carefully, evaluated my thoughts and then concluded by saying “Detan, it’s business it’s not sex. Your reasons are logical and valid and that’s all that matters“. That was the end of my self-doubt and I do not regret that decision to date. I find myself using that phrase ever so often, whenever I need to knock myself into logical reality sometimes.

However, this article has nothing to with that today. Rather, I’ll be sharing a couple of workplace matters, which you should avoid pulling out your “personal relationship”, “work-life balance“, “workplace socialization and fraternization”  “Generation Y-workstyle” or “millennial work style” card on and keep strictly and extremely professional.

The workplace isn’t what it used to be 10 years ago. A lot of companies have evolved in how they operate and deliver services to cater to the way society is evolving now. This is also in a bid to attract and retain great talent while promoting their creativity in a less-serious environment. There are a couple of policies, conducts and activities that you find at work these days to enable this. Some of them include – remote work/work from home, dress-down days, awayday, team-bonding etc.

With the evolvement of these new ways of working, it means that relationships are easier to build and maintain. People are also bound to express themselves and treat work a little differently than we are used to. I digress a bit here – my former company actually encouraged dating and getting married to your co-workers. According to them and due to the exhaustive nature of the job, you are less distracted in your work and in your personal life, if your spouse understands and can relate, whenever you have to work late or to make matters worse, your spouse will probably be working late with you as well, so you’re good. There were controls in place to mitigate potential risks here though.

With this in mind, I do think some things should not be mixed into the bucket of socialization and “wokeness” because they do get messy and could lead to career regrets later on. A couple of those are:

Performance Management and Appraisal Issues:

I think this is the first and most important. For a manager, you should be tempted to handle your team members’ performance issues like they are personal even though they are your friend’s outside work.

• … be honest and professional with appraisal and performance discussions,
• … ensure they are well documented,
• .. make sure that comments are objective and driven by evidence,
• … ensure that recommendations for improvement are detailed, documented and followed through.

 

There are two (2) major reasons here:

1. you help yourself by building stronger teams and team members which makes your work easier
2. you help your team members build their competence and confidence, by being professional and objective about their performance. They should never feel that cannot measure up to their counterparts in other organizations because you are not objective and truthful with them on how they are performing at work

Quality of Work and Results

I honestly think people that do not take the quality and output of their work seriously should just take two seats..and a couple of more seats after that. Whether you have a personal relationship with your work colleagues or not, quality and results are not something you should joke with.

This is because this says more about you than about them. Your work and deliverable is your legacy, your representative and your voice when you aren’t there to speak for yourself. I’ve seen situations where people leave jobs and years after, a stranger digs up a reference to what they have done and it’s still fit for purpose even after 7 years. “What does this say about me?” – that is the kind of mindset to have regarding the quality of your work.

e-mails, e-mails, e-mails!

Sigh…

This one can get tricky though, but as long as it’s documented, make it professional. e-mails have a way of biting us in the butt afterwards. While it is advised to keep emails personable and tones less seriously. it is also advised to err on the side of being too professional when communicating with coworkers, our boss, and our clients. We’re given the impression that it’s better to be safe than sorry and to be careful not to come off as too casual or worse, disrespectful. However, a few tips:

• … Know the difference between being personable and personal.
• … send emails with a purpose, not just without reason
• … avoid typos  and grammatical errors and possibly innuendos
• … pause and think – Do I have to send this in an email? or Do I have to send this to this person at all?

Just like the Quality of work and results, emails are made up of your words – they are your words and they speak on your behalf.

Financial and Contractual issues

This is is quite obvious. They are binding and should not be joked with. Money matters and contracts are not what anyone should joke with even in their personal life. it doesn’t matter if you’re going into a contract with your colleague. Be careful about what you categorize as a psychological commitment with your colleague or even a vendor. When the chips are down what do you have left

Appearance and Outlook

This gets tricky and but also quite simple. “How do I look?” has no wrong answers. You should, however, look like how your organization has asked you to look, with very good grooming and not how you think you should look. Period. Dressing and clothing selections actually contribute to career success. Funny. Lool. A wardrobe accident may not only distract your colleagues but also raise concerns about your judgment, professionalism and “put-together-ness“. Check your company’s dress code, the industry’s practice and decide on your style to suit both professionally. Better still, dress like your industry mentor – they must be doing something right, right?

I hope this helps you learn and avoid some career catastrophe, even if you’re married to your colleague!